“Abujee, I’m booored”
Words that have always made me cringe. I strongly believe that children need to stop getting so agitated and restless with boredom. If they have nothing to do, their minds should offer them a limitless playground of ideas and thoughts.
“To be bored is to stop reacting to the external world, and to explore the internal one.” (source)
I fondly remember my youth when I would sit around the house waiting for my friends to come over and play. I would bide my time mulling around the house, sitting on the front porch, or quietly exploring my surroundings. Some days this could last half the day!
These moments to myself were so amazingly peaceful. An outsider would have thought them to be an immense waste of time, but looking back I wouldn’t trade them for the world.
No email. No TV. No video games. No distractions. Just me and the real world. Just me and the stone I was kicking. Just me and the tree I was climbing. Just me and the ants on the sidewalk. Just me and the cars passing by.
I look back wistfully at those long gone days of effortless simplicity.
I miss being bored. I miss the quietness of nothingness. I miss the concept of ‘spare time’ when one could hit the pause button on life. I’m not talking minutes folks – I’m talking hours.
And I now struggle to convey that sensation, that nostalgia to my children.
I struggle to impart upon them the other-worldliness of disconnecting from the all-encompassing virtual world.
I struggle to explain to them how disengaging from the twitchy distractions of this world will bring out their humanity.
I struggle to convince them that boredom ought to be embraced and celebrated, not rejected and disparaged.
I struggle to teach them that gadgets and trinkets, data and information, bits and bytes don’t make the person, but a thriving imagination, multifaceted emotions, and an intimate knowledge of yourself makes you a human.
I struggle to assure them that our senses need not constantly remain stimulated by external sources, rather the internal fountain of divine inspiration is forever flowing and can be tapped wherever and whenever we wish.
Instead, society is forcing me to cease my crusade on behalf of boredom while coaxing me to entertain my children.
“What? Your kids don’t have the Wii?! That’s inhumane!”
“What’s so wrong with giving them limited access to the Web?”
“Why do you deprive your children from visiting the likes of Disney World?”
“At least let your daughter have an email address. Let her join the rest of us in the 21st century.”
“What’s the big deal with letting your son have an iTouch?”
What’s the big deal?!
What’s the big deal with letting my kids feel and enjoy uninterrupted stints of boredom?
What’s the big deal with teaching my kids how to feel at peace while being alone?
What’s the big deal with allowing my kids to mull around the house with their senses on park, but their brains on hyperdrive?
What’s the big deal with giving my kids the freedom to simply be themselves?
Must I be forced to amuse my children to death?
Must I be forced to tether my children to the world?
Must I be forced to surrender my children to their nafs?
Alas, my dilemma is not isolated to my offspring, for I too wish to be free of these virtual chains that are slowly choking away our humanity.
I so desire to experience again the joy of boredom.
(Inspired by this article, Joy of Boredom)
Just don’t call it genocide
1 week ago
11 comments:
what a great post. it truly is scary how quickly we become attached...and how important it is to let kids use their imagination for a change to entertain themselves. congrats bro. naeem. u must be a wonderful father.
Abujee's belt = Real world = love of boredom for kids ;)
urgh! this post was sooo boring!!!
j/k
I liked your expression in this line very much: I struggle to explain to them how disengaging from the twitchy distractions of this world will bring out their humanity. Twitchy distractions, very excellently put. And i like how your usage of the word describes the distractions and juxtaposes the very natural human like qualities you're trying to get at.
I often think about how the concept of boredom has come about and how spare time was perceived "back in the day". My mum used to tell us when she was growing up (probs, 60s) there was no such thing as "boredom". I always found her comments irritating at the time but now I can appreciate their wisdom.
Your post surfaced another unsettled thought in my mind. We're so connected these days and still so isolated. Through a network of wires we make "connections" with people... relationships without the aid of technology are becoming such an alien notion. The idea of connectivity has even taken over the marriage domain. I wonder if you've got words for the concept of internet hookups.
Shabana Mir writes something similar :
http://koonjblog.wordpress.com/2009/08/10/long-boring-hours-of-lahore-afternoons/
I remember a childhood filled with hours of wandering around aimlessly, riding on my bike, reading a million captivating books for hours on end (very few kids are avid readers here in SA), making mud-cakes and sand castles. Bliss. Those were the days *sigh*
"I miss the quietness of nothingness" - sums it up fantastically.
These days kids are over-stimulated and it's almost like they become addicted to this over-stimulation, hence the inability to "just be"... they always have to be "doing".
I just taught in a school for a couple of weeks and the negative effects of technology are clearly apparent. It's like kids don't know how to be kids anymore. They're all little adults and therefore become concerned with "adult issues" like boyfriends and girlfriends etc. When I was in the First Grade, I hated boys, they were gross and nasty. Today 1st graders are playing Mommy and Daddy. Disturbing to say the least.
Think my kids will grow up on 20 min of tv a day and only have access to the internet when they're 18. Worked wonders for me :)
I was watching some kids a few months ago, and it seemed they had nothing to do. It reminded me of the tremendous amount of free time I had in my youth...and how I wasted it. As adults, the amount of responsibilities we have make it seem like we can only dream of having so much spare time to do whatever we want.
These 'distractions,' as you call them, truly just eat away at our time. And for kids, it's even more dangerous because they have SO MUCH of that free time to be wasted by unproductive, non-beneficial things.
It's an uphill battle to get away from it all nowadays - because we are so connected to things and people via the technology that's around.
Perhaps you should spend some time in a rural/village area - where these distractions don't exist. I think that would be a great way to escape all of these things.... :)
The ironic thing about TV and overstimulation, I remember reading about how some Muslim parents in the West mistakenly believed that TV could occupy their children's free time instead of them wandering outside and "getting influenced" by "bad" kids outside (since you know the West offers alot of pitfalls and temptations for kids). So it's like they took their kids out of the frying pan and into the fire so to speak even if they initially had good intentions.
Another bad side effect of TV and the media is that it sucks the imagination out of kids. I've read studies that showed that two year olds exposed to those "learning" programs (like Baby Einstein) were actually less likely to learn on their own because the TV was doing it for them. Thanks to Hollywood and video game special effects and stories of fantastical places and creatures, kids nowadays are actually "bored" of things in the natural world. They're no longer filled with wonder at something as real and majestic as a horse because they're so used to seeing imaginary unicorns and pegasus!
What's even worse is that these same kids "bored" of the real world grow up to be adults "bored" of it too...
Loved reading that post, like many prior ones, MashaAllah.
I would like to add that all these distractions unquestionably dim the essential Creative spirit in a child.
Teaching kids to always look for a programmed-outlet for their energy is almost like an organized crime! =D
AA-
@Anon1, "u must be a wonderful father."
A great husband as well. Remember?
@Anon2, LOOOL!! I see ur inner Paki is coming out.
@Somethingtobe, "My mum used to tell us when she was growing up (probs, 60s) there was no such thing as "boredom"."
I'm constantly amazed by these stories from our elders. I love how their lives were so simple and 'boring'.
AA-
@Anon3, thanks for the Koonj link. She definitely captured my sentiments, but in a much better way!
@Azra, "hence the inability to "just be"... they always have to be "doing"."
I remember reading a story of a mother giving her child a licorice stick and her kid asking 'what does it do?'
Over-stimulation indeed.
@DL, "Perhaps you should spend some time in a rural/village area - where these distractions don't exist."
My parents currently live in a very quiet rural setting in Pakistan and the pace of life there is so peaceful.
@R, "What's even worse is that these same kids "bored" of the real world grow up to be adults "bored" of it too..."
What an amazingly true observation! I didn't make the link until you mentioned it. Sooo true how over-stimulation in the child is reflected in the need for constant stimulation as an adult.
Great point!
@Dudey, "Teaching kids to always look for a programmed-outlet for their energy is almost like an organized crime!"
Very true. A child's energy should be allowed to dissipate in whatever form or manner he/she desires. That's how imagination is nurtured.
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