When a friend who's borrowed some money has a heart attack and the first thought that comes to your mind is 'uh-oh, I'm not gonna see my money.'
How pathetic!
And to think, some of you thought my last post was too harsh. Now you understand?
WAW
3 days ago
8 comments:
Salaams brother. May your friend be well. Thank you for this honest reminder, as it calls us to each examine ourselves and address if we see ourselves in the mirror of you right now. Seek forgiveness from your Lord, who is Most Merciful, and absolve your friend of his debt to you, inshaAllah. I fear it would have been my first thought too. :(
Yes. Your absolutely right. It is true, if a friend had asked any one of us for money from suffering a heart attack, Im sure that our first thought would, "Im not getting that money back"
Of course it shows your greed for this duniya, but I think another way to look at it is, if you gave the money or not.
First thoughts are always..not the whole picture?
-The Muslim Kid-
Well, I think it should be a reminder for those deadbeats who delay or blow off repaying debts. That debt will eventually get settle. Either in this world or the next. The choice is yours.
As far as forgiving the debt. Did he die? Is he late paying? If he died and the time to repay the debt hasn't come than I would without a doubt forgive him. However, if he is alive or dead and has made no efforts to repay me then I would have to pray on that one. Not everyone deserves to be forgiven. A muslim brother cussed my dh out when he inquired about the money he loaned him. i was pregnant with my first child 9 years ago and it was our phone bill money but the brorther needed it. He still has not paid us back and he dissed my husband after and stopped being his friend!
Salaam Brother:
May Allah, who is both pain and cure, heal your friend. Ameen.
Your honest post is indeed all too human, and we are all certainly guilty of such thoughts. However, it helps to remember that for every act of charity in this life, Allah repays us a hundredfold in the next, so consider any money loaned an investment on the future :)
Ya Haqq!
Salaams,
I read a long time ago and still try to follow that old adage 'neither a borrower nor a lender be!'
From my experience if you lend to a friend, you stand a good chance of either losing the money or the friendship.
Hope your friend gets better.
I agree with mezba...either let the debt go...or the friendship...cause its hard to be friends with someone that "owes" you something.
AA-
@Aaminah, Thank you for your kind thoughts. Good advice on seeking Allah's forgiveness!
@MK, "First thoughts are always..not the whole picture?"
True, but they really give you insight on what really matters to you. It really bothered me that my first thought was so...selfish.
@UmmAdam, "Well, I think it should be a reminder for those deadbeats who delay or blow off repaying debts."
LOL! In defense of the brother, he is NOT late in paying back his debt. In fact, I don't even *need* the money (doesn't that make my plight even that much more pathetic!).
About your husbands bad experience in loaning money, I've had similar experience as well...where I got put on the defensive for asking about money I was owed. I've since forgiven the brother as I wouldn't want something as trifle as my money getting in the way of his judgment with Allah (swt).
AA-
@Irving, "it helps to remember that for every act of charity in this life, Allah repays us a hundredfold in the next, so consider any money loaned an investment on the future :)"
So true brother. Thanks for the beautiful reminder. But in reality, my issue has NOTHING to do with my potential loss of money. Rather it was my initial, *reflexive* (ie. out of my conscious control) response that REALLY, REALLY bothers me.
I have sooo far to travel to get to my destination...Ya Allah!
@Mezba and CoolRed38, your advice is much appreciated although I prefer not to adhere to it. After all, who can one get help from in their time of need if not from friends?
Whenever I do lend out money (which isn't that often, truth be told), I make sure I can live without it (in case its never returned).
However, as I mentioned to Br. Irving above, its not about the money or my relationship with my friend, but about my relationship with myself. I'm extremely troubled by my internal response to this tragic even. Really bothered that I failed this minor yet powerful test.
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